To: Blogging Friends
Subject: [Citizen of the Month] Unique Business Opportunity
Dear Fellow Bloggers,
I am writing to you tonight from one of the world’s poorest countries in Africa. I received an email this morning offering me a great opportunity to make a lot of money. I love so many of you and appreciate your friendship. That’s why I want to extend this opportunity to you as well.
A recent aquaintance of mine, Mobuku, recently stumbled across a bundle of American dollar bills sitting on the street in his country. The worth of this money was US$14,000,000:00.(FOURTEEN MILLION USD). It belonged to a American businessman who died along with his entire family in an unfortunate plane crash. Of course, Mobuku tried to contact the next of kin, as is required by the banking guidelines of this terribly impoverished African country, but sadly, all of the businessman’s relations died in the plane crash — leaving nobody behind for the claim.
The banking laws of this corrupt Third World country are very specific:
No citizen of this country walking around on foot can claim millions of dollars found in the street. It must be claimed by either a relative or someone (or some group) in the country of the deceased at the time of the money’s discovery.
When Mobuku emailed me with this opportunity, I immediately jumped at the chance. But on my arrival here, there was a major hitch. The money was discovered on September 2. the exact day that I was with a couple of buddies at a strip joint in Montreal, Canada. So, officially, I was NOT in the country of the deceased at the time of the money’s discovery.
I therefore make this business proposal to you, my dear blogging friends. Since I cannot claim this money by myself due to the legal requirements of this overcrowded and polluted country, I will consider ALL OF YOU as the next of kin. After all, nobody is coming for it and we don’t want this money to go into the bank treasury as unclaimed money.
As my mother might say, "That would be a waste."
We agree that 30% of this money will be set aside to be shared equally by every blogger who commits to be a partner in this enterprise, 10% will be set aside for expenses incurred during the business, and 60% would be for Mobuku and I.
Thereafter, I will visit each blogger in person (at your own expense, of course), for disbursement according to the percentages indicated.
To enable the immediate transfer of these funds to you as arranged, you must first apply as the "next of kin of the deceased." This means I will need each of you to write down your bank name, bank account number, private telephone and fax number for easy and effective communication, and location wherein the money will be remitted — and send me the information now.
Please, time is running out, as this terribly anti-Semitic African country has it’s own very weird Daylight Savings Time system that is very confusing, and the food is terrible.
This is the opportunity of a lifetime. Blogging favorite Stephanie Klein is already on board as a partner. Please join Stephanie, Mobuku, and me in this unique business arrangement.
Soon, we will ALL be so rich, we can blog to our heart’s content!
Yours faithfully,
Neil
