It’s a story as old as Adam and Eve. A man and woman accidentally bump into each other in a garden. They have no idea who the other is. She calls him a douche. He calls her a “retard.” She lectures him for weeks for being an ignorant asshole. He accuses her of using her “tits” for attention, and insists that Schmutzie should have won as the Best Canadian Blogger, not her. She says he is a “momma’s boy” who needs to get laid, even though she assumes his “dick” is the size of a thimble. He says she is a “small-town girl” who uses a tractor as her main source of transportation. She again insults the size of his dick, and broadcasts it on Twitter. He questions her authenticity, calling her online persona a “fake brand.” She promises to attend his session on writing at BlogHer, but attends the one with the Bloggess instead. He dubs her as the “manipulative popular sob story writer from the boonies who can’t even color her own pubic hair correctly.” She says he is a needy neurotic suck-up to women online. He calls her a flirt, using men’s attention to mask her insecurity.
And then something happens. The man wakes up one day and realizes that this woman he hated the most in the world, his ultimate nemesis, — well, he didn’t really hate her at all. In fact, he LOVED HER! She was real and intelligent and funny and talented and caring, and he “related” to her outlook on life.
I have no idea how it happened, but I have turned to Tanis, the Redneck Mommy, more times this year than I would have hoped, and she was always there with her special humor and wisdom. And I don’t think I’ve ever met a more dedicated mother, wife and friend to others… ever. Just don’t cross her.
Sure, blogging is about writing. And sometimes you get 30,000 views in one day when you write about breastfeeding. But as you can see, it never lasts very long.
It is the people you meet along the way that really matter.
Happy Birthday, Tanis.
By the way, I already saw that Avitable wrote you a birthday post, too. I’m sure Backpacking Dad is next.
Flirt.
