I was tired of my lady
We’d been together too long
Like a worn-out recording
Of a favorite song
So while she lay there sleeping
I went on the internet
And in the personal columns
There was this letter I read
“If you like cuban mojitos
And “Do You Think You Can Dance?”
If you’re not into football
Do you own cargo pants?
If you like making love in the morning
Before eating a crepe
Then you’re the love that I’ve looked for
Write to me and escape.”
I didn’t think about my lady
I know that sounds kind of mean
But me and my old lady
Have fallen into the same old fighting routine
So I went on the internet
Took out a personal ad
And though I’m nobody’s poet
I thought it wasn’t half bad
“Yes I like cuban mojitos
And “Do You Think You Can Dance?”
I’m not much into LA
I’d rather be living in France
I’ve got to meet you by tomorrow noon
I don’t care if you look like an ape
At our local Starbucks
Where we’ll plan our escape.”
So I waited with high hopes
And she walked in the place
I knew her smile in an instant
I knew the curve of her face
It was my own Sophia
And she said, “Oh it’s you.”
Then we laughed for a moment
And I said, “I never knew.”
That you like cuban mojitos
And “Do You Think You Can Dance?”
Laughing at Susan Lucci
And living in France
If you like making love in the morning
Before eating a crepe
You’re the lady I’ve looked for
Come with me and escape
What do you mean you didn’t know that?
We watch AMC each day!
There seems to be some marital problems
Unresolved since May
Should we take another breather
You and me both apart
Or should we go and listen
To what’s in our heart?
That you like cuban mojitos
And “Do You Think You Can Dance?”
Laughing at Susan Lucci
And living in France
If you like making love in the morning
Before eating a crepe
You’re the one that I’ve looked for
Come with me and escape
A Year Ago on Citizen of the Month: My Life in Haircuts
