the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

Category: Movies and Television (Page 7 of 8)

A Very Special Reba

REBA2.jpg

I’m a big fan of sitcoms touching on real issues.  The 1970’s were famous for combining comedy and social issues such as rape, cancer, and race on shows like "All in the Family" and "Maude."

This noble tradition continues.  Tonight, on a very special Reba (9 pm on the WB) Reba and Jake take in a family displaced by Hurricane Katrina. (no joke)

excerpt from Reba script

Door bell rings.  Reba answers the door.  It is a large group of cold, wet, ragged, displaced mostly-African-American hurricane survivors — men, women, and children.  Jake looks furious.

Jake:  Reba, how many more refugees can we take in?

Reba:  They’re not refugees.  They’re displaced persons.

Jake:  Whatever.  We are already putting up 25 people in our guest bedroom.  When is the government gonna do their job?  It’s not our responsibility.  We’re already FLOODED with people in here.

LAUGHTER.

Reba:  Shh… don’t say that word!

MORE LAUGHTER.

Displaced person #1:  (shivering) Can we come in now, Reba?

Reba:  Sure thing, black folks, come on it.  Mi casa es su casa.

Jake:  Hold on, hold on.  Enough of all this liberal JAZZ, Reba.

Reba.  Don’t say "jazz," Jake.  You know…. New Orleans and such…

LAUGHTER.

Jake:  OK, enough of this "country music," Reba…

MORE LAUGHTER.

Reba:  Country music!  Did I hear country music? 

THE AUDIENCE EXPLODES IN APPLAUSE.  REBA PICKS UP A GUITAR.

Reba:  Here’s a song I wrote in honor of all the lovely people touched  by Hurricane Katrina.

REBA SINGS A SONG TITLED "THE WINDS CAN’T TAKE AWAY MY LAUGHTER."

I Wanna Be Taken SERIOUSLY

familymat1.jpg

"That last post was so funny," he said to me.

"Oh, yeah!"  I said annoyed, "Wait until until you read my next post.  It’s going to be a SERIOUS analysis of Ecuador’s economy!"

I was having a "Woody Allen" moment.  You know, the one he had right after "Annie Hall" when he said to himself, "No more silly films.  Now I’m going to be taken SERIOUSLY."

One of my favorite movies is Preston Sturges’  "Sullivan’s Travels."  In it, a film director of escapist movies decides to become a serious director and goes to learn about "life" by living with the Depression-era hobos on the trains.

Today, every "artist" wants to be taken seriously.   Maybe that’s why supermodels never smile in their photos.  Even television people want critics to view their work as high art.  They show "retrospectives" of sitcoms like "My Two Dads" at the Museum of Television and Radio.  Porn stars now have their own award show.  Stuntmen are fighting for their own category in the Oscars.   Maybe because more of us are familiar with Desi Arnaz and "I Love Lucy" than Donizetti and "Lucia di Lammemoor," we need to make believe our low-brow tastes are as important as high-culture.  There was even a popular best-selling book by Steven Johnson titled "Everything Bad is Good For You:  How Today’s Pop Culture Is Actually Making Us Smarter."   According to Johnson, we should let our children stay up to watch "Survivor" and "Fear Factor."

Go ahead and let them watch more television, too, since even reality shows can function as "elaborately staged group psychology experiments" to stimulate rather than pacify the brain.

Even the intellectually astute Michael Blowhard  has taken literary snobs to task for not appreciating the writing skills of sensationalist shlock-writer Jackie Collins, author of such books as "The Bitch" and "The Stud."

Why are many people’s attitudes towards popular fiction different than their attitudes towards the popular arts in other fields? By now, most sophisticated and educated people can see virtues in rock and roll; in sitcoms; in action-adventure movies; and in barbecued ribs, ice cream, and corn on the cob. Yet where fiction-books are concerned … Well, if these people are caught reading a blockbuster, they laugh, they apologize. They want you to know they’re slumming; they really do know better.  Really what they care about is the serious and good stuff.

I’m not a snob about these things and I like this reinterpretation of what’s high art and what’s low art.   Still, without sounding like a fuddy-duddy, there should be some standards, and there’s nothing as annoying as hearing a popular artist kvetch about their own popularity.  It’s one of the reasons so many Hollywood actors want to speak about politics.  They don’t want to just be a lowly actor and make millions of dollars for play-acting.  They want to be a force for good

Sitcom writers don’t just want to be sitcom writers.  It’s not enough to be making tons of money and getting your work on television.  You want to be taken seriously as a writer.  You may be a "writer," but the reason you’re not as esteemed as Dostoyevsky is because you wrote your first draft while drinking a ice-blended mocha at the Coffee Bean.  Dostoyevsky spent four years in the Siberian maximum security prison in Omsk, with ten-pound iron chains around his ankles and wrists in a lice-infested, filth-ridden “cemetery-of-the-living” which he later described in "The House of the Dead."  Now, even the Disney cafeteria isn’t that bad.

It seems ironic that so many artists are so concerned with being taken seriously when our culture seems only to care about what is popular.  The entertainment section of the paper is filled with stories about the top box-office movies and top-ten network shows.  Hollywood envies successful producers like Jerry Bruckheimer.  Who knows… maybe even he’s unhappy with his popular successes.  Is it possible that Jerry Bruckheimer is secretly writing a low-budget script about his loving relationship with his offbeat "grandpa" — a project without one car blowing up?

In the blogging world, you have popular sites like Gawker and Defamer that feed their audience snarky gossip.   They get large amounts of readers.  I have a friend who writes a fantastic blog on the topic of Earth Science.  He has three readers.  I would give you the link, but I think he would have a heart attack if too many of you actually showed up. 

Let’s hope that the producers of Gawker and Defamer don’t complain about not being taken seriously.

A popular artist who is overly concerned about being taken seriously is like the prom queen complaining that she wasn’t asked to be on the math team.   What are you complaining about?  We all want to be like YOU. 

Recently, there’s even been some fighting among the usually mutually-supportive women writers as some tried to separate themselves from the popular chick-lit label.   When Curtis Sittenfeld reviewed Melissa Bank’s "The Wonder Spot" in the New York Times Book Review, many saw it as an attack on the genre —  and an excuse for Ms. Sittenfeld to re-create her own image as a "serious" writer.  Popular chick-lit writer Jennnifer Weiner then responded to the review, mocking Ms. Sittenfeld:

"The more I think about the increasingly angry divide between ladies who write literature and chicks who write chick lit, the more it seems like a grown-up version of the smart versus pretty games of years ago; like so much jockeying for position in the cafeteria and mocking the girls who are nerdier/sluttier/stupider than you, to make yourself feel more secure about your own place in the pecking order."

Why is  Ms. Sittenfeld ashamed of the term chick lit?  It is very popular and has helped hundreds of other female writers to get published.   If you write a light book about a young woman in Manhattan juggling men while working as an assistant editor at a fabulous women’s magazine, chances are the book is Chick Lit.  If the book is about a poor female mine worker dealing with her mother dying of an inoperable tumor, chances are it isn’t Chick Lit

Soon, sitcom writers are going to complain about their work being called "sitcoms."   Will sitcoms soon be called Short Televised Humorous Novellas?

As some woman might suggest in a chick lit book, "Do you really need to have it all?"  Do you need to have popularity and be taken seriously?

As for myself, I’ll hold off on that article about Ecuador.  I still want as many readers as possible. 

familymat2.jpg

TV is for Babies

babytv.jpg

The news hit Hollywood hard today.  Despite a slate of new summer series, it was a disappointing summer for the TV networks, with household viewing down 6% compared to last year.

Some cable networks are scrambling for new viewers.  This  morning, the Cartoon Network started a two hour block of programming for preschoolers, even children under a year old.

To tailor the cartoon block to make it more appropriate for young kids, the "Tickle U" block contains no shows longer than 11 minutes (most are closer to five minutes). Commercials are shown only on the half-hour, not between every cartoon.

Advertisers are also very keen on getting their products to this new demographic.

"This is a great advance for all of us in the advertising industry," said Morton Phonyperson, president of the Baby Advertising Council.  "I look forward to the day when babies across America say "Sugar Frosted Flakes" as their first words rather than "Mama, mama."

FOX, seeing potential in this new area of programming, has gone one step further by ordering 13 episodes of "Prenatal P.I.," a procedural drama about a 3 month old fetus who helps her police detective mother solve crimes at a Los Angeles C.S.I. crime lab.

Kissing

kissy.jpg

Pauly has another amusing post today — this time about "dog kissing."  And since I always find him inspirational, Pauly got me thinking about the subject of kissing (and not just with dogs). 

I miss kissing a lot, although I still try to get in a little kissing with Sophia if I can get her drunk enough.  The fact that I like kissing is surprising to me because I’m a bit of a hypochondriac.  Kissing is one of God’s greatest inventions, but if you think about it, it’s a germ-filled activity that can get you a cold.  Maybe the Eskimos have it right by kissing with their noses.  At least it’s sanitary.

Last night, I was watching a Tivo-ed episode of Average Joe, one of those second-rate dating reality shows.  This uninspiring girl goes out with one guy after another, seeing which one she likes the best.  All the guys are "amazed" with this dull woman.  Why are they so amazed?  Is it because she seems to have real boobs and they haven’t seen that before?

I would be a terrible reality dating show contestant.  Why can’t they ever find a smart woman who’s also beautiful? 

This year, Average Joe had a "twist."  Some of the nerds were kicked off, then came back after an extreme makeover.  All of a sudden, Marlena, or whatever her name is this year, was all hot for the guys because they were now looking good.  This time she used the word "amazed" over and over again.  All the guys were salivating over the opportunity for a second chance.  I was grimacing as one by one, they each sucked up to her by saying how amazing she was.  Now I’m as ass-kissy as they come, especially when it comes to wooing a woman, but these guys were making me nauseous.  Have some self-respect, guys!

If she picked me, I would say, "Screw you.  You didn’t want me before.  Now that I got the nose job and a trendy earring, I’m off to meet a woman who didn’t make me feel like a loser the first time." 

None of these reality show relationships work out anyway. 

If I were on the show, I would spend more time flirting with the female executive producer than the "girl," hoping to work my way into a new job. 

Oh, yeah, right… back to kissing.  In each episode of Average Joe, the woman goes on several dates with the guys.  At the end of each date, it’s inevitable that the couple starts kissing.  And it’s always some intense, open mouth kiss that the camera zooms in on.

Now, if I’m on a date with this woman, and I know that two hours ago, on her last date, she was french kissing some other guy, and three hours before that she giving some tongue action with a third guy — am I really going to want to kiss her?  It’s not even the fear of catching mono.  Maybe it’s me, but I think as I was kissing her, it would feel as if I’m kissing all the other guys — once removed.  And that’s just disgusting.

If I just wanted to kiss all the guys, I would just hang out back at the mansion rather than going on a boring date with this dumb chick.

But that’s a whole other reality show.

A Geek Speaks

richard.jpg
(Richard trying to look non-geeky with Mindi)
(via wb.com)

One of the summer’s more popular reality shows is "Beauty and the Geek."  Women seem to love it, because women love to change a man, whether it’s a geek to a hunk, or a jerk to a nice guy.    Television executives seem to instinctively understand this.   What’s more fun for a woman viewer than watching these geeky eggheads become cool dudes (with a little help from some women, of course)?

As a board member of JAGS (Jewish American Geek Society), my biggest problem with "Beauty and the Geek"  is the unrealistic portrayal of a geek.   You non-geeks of the world would love to think that deep down, all geeks want to be just like you ordinary mortals.  Put a little hair gel in our hair and we’re like every other guy on the corner, salivating over the bikini blond at the beach.  

Hogwash.   Geeks do not like the beach, especially without SPF 100.

The whole idea of geekiness is that you sublimate your sexual interests into something obscure, like physics or comic book collecting.   A real geek would easily trade one of these silly girls for a mint condition edition of Batman #5:  Batman meets the Joker.    There have been known instances where the libido of a male geek is brought into the open — after much assistance and therapy — but I doubt any red-blooded geek would be salivating over these dumb, poor-spelling girls for very long.  

Geekiness is something ingrained, like homosexuality, and cannot be changed with a "makeover."  A real geek would be bored very quickly.    Adam Mesh from "Average Joe" is average, but not a real geek.  Richard of "Beauty and the Geek"  is closer to being a real geek, but someone as annoying as him would not be allowed to vote at one of our board meetings.

Winnie, No!

win2.jpg
Danica McKellar in Stuff Magazine (July 2005)

The last I heard about Danica McKellar (Winnie Cooper on The Wonder Years), she was a UCLA math genius publishing a paper on “Percolation and Gibbs states multiplicity for ferromagnetic Ashkin-Teller models on Z2” (no joke).

Of course, since there is a tremendous glut of brilliant female mathematicians in American academia, Ms. McKellar chose the more difficult path of trying to drum up more acting roles by posing in her underwear for Stuff Magazine.

Danica, I understand you’re all grown up now and an attractive woman, but I felt a little uncomfortable looking at Winnie like this.  To be fair, I wouldn’t want to see Fred Savage in his Jockeys either.

Indiana Jones, AARP member

harrison.jpg

At a gala event in honor of George Lucas, Steven Spielberg revealed that writer Jeff Nathanson is finishing up the script for Indiana Jones 4.  Rumor has it that Harrison Ford’s real life girlfriend, Calista Flockhart, would play his love interest.

calista.jpg

Is it only me, or is America in real trouble this time of losing that mysterious artifact to the Nazis?   The sixty-two year old Ford is in great shape, but now he has to help shlep this scrawny woman up the mountainside?  Karen Allen, where are you now? 

Television Season — Out!

Desperate Housewives, 24, Lost, and American Idol all ended this week, so my network television-viewing season is over.  Maybe I’ll now read more books or actually go outside. 

My report card:

Desperate Housewives:

It was inevitable that actor Roger Bart (Bree’s pharmacist friend) signed on as next season’s villain.   That will make for some interesting twists.  On the whole, Desperate Housewives was a fresh show that was somewhat over-rated.  I think it received media attention because the media likes shows about pretty women, especially when the shows have sexy titles.   The negative:  all of the characters were one-dimensional and there was an uneven mix of comedy, drama, and mystery wrapped in a phony suburban setting.  The positive:  It was a fun twist on the soap opera genre that will become better as the characters develop.  Teri Hatcher was also pretty adorable as Susan.  I liked her daughter, too.

Score:   A –

24

24 has been my favorite show for the last four seasons, but I must admit, it lost its focus this year.  One of the problems was that Jack Bauer was less interesting than half of the other characters, including Chloe, Edgar, Tony, Michelle, David Palmer, Novick, and even President Logan.  It’s nice that Kiefer Sutherland is so generous with his co-stars (especially when he is an executive producer), but he was upstaged in every episode.   His relationship with Audrey was fairly blah.  I hate to say this, but I missed his hapless daughter, Kim.

The Dina and Behrooz story was clearly the coolest subplot, but they were dropped in the middle of the story for the evil Mahrwan, a more traditional villain.  How many fans were waiting to find out that Dina wasn’t dead, but was the mastermind of the entire plot?  And Behrooz — what finally happened to him?  Luckily, I learned from Entertainment Weekly that the producers filmed a scene where Behrooz learned of his mother’s death,  but the scene was edited out.  Why?

Score:   B +

American Idol

This is my guilty pleasure.  Unfortunately, this was the dullest season yet, even though the singers were better than usual.  I think the format is getting a little tired.  None of the singers really stood out as a superstar.  Even Bo.   Vonzell had the best voice.  Constantine and Nadia were the most fun.   Carrie was too cutesy for me.  Kelly Clarkson, Ruben Studdard, Clay Aiken, and Fantasia all had a spark that no one had this year.  Even the "bad" singers weren’t as humorous as in the past.  Most annoying were the stock responses by the judges, with Randy’s "dawg," Paula’s smile, and Simon’s sarcasm.  The only one I liked better this year was Ryan Seacrest, who at least has fun hosting every week.  That said, the final episode was a lot of fun.  Carrie’s win was a surprise, and I enjoyed the idols singing with their "idols." 

Score:  B

Lost

Lost was the year’s biggest surprise.  The concept sounded incredibly stupid, sort of a dramatic Gilligan’s Island, but it was totally engrossing and mysterious throughout the year.  Watch it in reruns if you haven’t seen it.

Score:   A

« Older posts Newer posts »
Social media & sharing icons powered by UltimatelySocial