Category: Misc. Humor (Page 4 of 4)

I noticed that in Sunday’s papers there were already a ton of ads for school clothes and school supplies.  Who can forget those weeks before school — the excitement of getting new clothes and buying a new lunchbox.  Do kids use lunchboxes anymore?  Is there an American Idol lunchbox?

A number of my new online friends are teachers, and I see that they are writing less and less on their blogs as they get ready for the new year.  Is there anyone more important and less glorified than a teacher? 

I can say without hesitation that I wouldn’t be who I am today without the influences of my marvelous teachers.   Even yesterday’s Ken and Barbie sex post was easy to do because I already did something similar years ago with my GI Joe and the model I made of my nine grade teacher, Miss Donne.  Thank you, Miss Donne!  I know you would be proud.

I love teachers.  I remember you all, every single one of you — from kindergarten through college.  I have so many great memories of my teachers.  Some of my best memories include sitting in the school bus on the way to school and singing songs in your honor. 

Like this one:

Glory glory hallelujah!
Teacher hit me with a ruler.
Hit her in the bean with a rotten tangerine,
and she won’t be coming round no more.

What fun I used to have!

By the way, did you know that most teachers spend hundreds of dollars of their own money just to get school supplies in cash-deprived school districts?

Here’s another one of my favorite "teacher" songs:

Mine eyes have seen the glory
of the burning of the school.
We have tortured every teacher,
we have broken every rule.
When the principal tried to stop us,
we just flushed him down the stool.

Why do we pay idiots like Hollywood actors so much money and we can’t pay a teacher a decent salary?

I’m sure you all remember this popular song:

Row row row your boat
gently down the stream.
Throw your teacher overboard
and listen to her scream.

It’s especially hard to be a teacher today because with most parents are working, and the teacher has to become a parent figure to many of their children. 

You can just hear the appreciation in this little ditty:

On Top of Old Smokey
all covered with sand,
I shot my poor teacher
with a green rubber band.
I shot her with pleasure,
I shot her with pride,
I couldn’t have missed her—
She’s forty feet wide.

I understand the lack of posts written by my blogging teacher friends.  All of us are with you.  You are the custodians of our country’s future.  It is you that mold the minds of the young, and make them into responsible and caring human beings ready to take us into the next century.

Teachers, I salute you with this final song, one that is especially popular with children coming to their first day of school:

Heigh ho, heigh ho, it’s off to school we go
with guns and knives and full bee hives.
Heigh ho, heigh ho, it’s off to school we go.
We’ll put some ants down teacher’s pants!
Heigh ho, heigh ho.

We love and appreciate you.

For more popular songs, go to Studies in Popular Culture.