Month: May 2006 (Page 3 of 3)

Sophia: The Lyrics

May 3, 2006 / Neil Kramer / 47 Comments

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Yes, we all had fun last week, sitting around the campfire and singing such favorites as “Melissa,” “Michelle,” and “Allison.”Â Â On Thursday, May 4th, as promised, will be the World Premiere of what is sure to be this summer’s hottest and most rockin’ song with a woman’s name as a title, “Sophia.”Â The lyrics have been written and tomorrow I’m going into the studio with one of LA’ sÂ hippest indie bands, “Citizen and the Months.”Â So, come back Thursday and BE READY TO ROCK!Â I will sing the song LIVE!

“SOPHIA”

They say no man should be alone
That’s why I called you on the phone.
Cause no one loves you like I do.

I know I’ve gone and done you wrong
That’s whyÂ I’m writing you this song
To tell you that my heart belongs to you.

chorus

Oh Sophia
I think of you all day
Oh Sophia
You rock me every way
Oh Sophia
Sweetest of them all
Oh baby
Why y’not answering my call?

Let’s put behind us all that stuff
Cause ‘without you’ is not enough
I’m waiting by the phone all night and day

I’m like a ship that’s lost at sea
So c’mon, baby, rescue me
You gotta listen to what I have to say

chorus

Oh Sophia
I think of you all day
Oh Sophia
You rock me every way
Oh Sophia
Sweetest of them all
Oh baby
Why y’not answering my call?

Oral Fixation

May 1, 2006 / Neil Kramer / 34 Comments

PRIVATE CHAT ROOM, 2AM

HOTDAVE23: Mmmm… U R HOT… cough… What are U… cough cough… wearing now?

2SEXYJUDY: Just my… cough cough… sexiest… cough cough… THONG…

HOTDAVE23: Wow…cough… R U as… cough .. TURNED ON as… cough… I am?

2SEXYJUDY: U make me so… cough cough… WET. I want your BIG… cough… HARD… cough… whoops, I dropped the.. cough… damn… cough… ashtray into my… cough cough… daughter's crib… BRB

Conversation overheard at DatingforSmokers.com.

Plagiarism, Lies, and Total BS in Writing

May 1, 2006 / Neil Kramer / 43 Comments

This weekend in Los Angeles was the 11th Annual Los Angeles Times Festival of Books. It's an enormous literary event attracting thousands of readers to the UCLA campus to attend lectures by such high-profile writers as Frank McCourt, Mitch Albom, Mary Higgins Clark, Joan Didion, Sebastian Junger, Joyce Carol Oates, Gay Talese, Amy Tan, Susan Vowell, and Gore Vidal.

I was very honored to be asked by the festival organizers to moderate one of the most controversial seminars, titled "Plagiarism, Lies, and Total BS in Writing." The panel consisted of several noted writers:

Kaavya Viswanathan, the Harvard undergraduate who's been accused of liberal 'borrowing' for How Opal Mehta got Kissed, Got Wild and Got a Life. I had just written a post about her, so I was very familiar with her situation.

James Frey, who wholly fabricated details of his outlaw life in order to sell his book, "A Million Little Pieces."

Jayson Blair, the New York Times reporter who faked quotes and even entire interviews, and plagiarized from other newspapers.

Michael Hiltzik, who just lost his LA Times "Golden State" column this weekend after it was found out that he was putting phony comments on his own LA.Times blog.

William Shakespeare, noted dramatist and poet, who plagiarized most of his historical plots from Raphael Holinshed's Chronicles.

A complete transcript of the seminar can be found at the book festival website.